# Pedes Mille, Mille Versibus.



## ash (Apr 23, 2013)

Yes folks, it's true. One thousand posts at the breakneck pace of a man procrastinating for all he's worth. As it seems to be the tradition around here I will commemorate the occasion by pledging a prestigious prize. As is my tradition, it will be my second-born natural shooter to the person who can best meet the challenge set forth below.

*One Thousand Feet, One Thousand Posts*.

Now that the 1000 posts part of the deal has been completed by this very announcement, it's up to you guys to fulfil the 1000 feet part.

*SHOOT A CAN AT ONE THOUSAND FEET!!!!!!!!iii!!11!*

Sound impossible? It's not if you're allowed to take as many shots as you like and add them all together 

You got it, Slingers. One shot at 1000 feet, two at 167 yards (EASY - A BOY COULD DO IT!), ten at 100 feet... all the way down to 1000 shots at one foot. You choose the distance and make the number of hits required to gather a total of 1000 feet. Show us the pictures, videos, radio broadcast, newspaper clippings or whatever evidence you can conjure up. The member who does it in the least number of shots (including misses) is the victor.


The more entertaining the presentation, the less picky I'll be about evidence, measurement etc.
Any normal sized can will do, whether it's a drink can or bean can or sauerkraut or whatever. Just not some huge 10kg coffee tin or beer keg.
Any ammo, any slingshot.
Enter as many times as you like. Start easy and go longer with each subsequent try. If you're going to go big, wait a while before posting your killer video.
The contest will conclude on the 14th of July 2013, so you have about two weeks including three weekends.

*The Spoils*

Check out my Forks and Materials gallery for the selection of prize opportunities: http://slingshotforum.com/gallery/album/1096-forks-and-materials/

There are another 30+ natural forks to be added. Only the first Oak fork is unavailable - that's my keeper. Feel free to state and discuss your preferred fork if you feel so bold as to claim certain victory in this thread. I will make it to the winner's desired specification including caps,laminations, finish and delivery as requested and where possible.



*GO TO IT!*


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## e~shot (Jun 3, 2010)

Congrats on 1K post mate!


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## bigron (Nov 29, 2012)

great give away for those with video cameras


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## Charles (Aug 26, 2010)

Congratulations on this momentous milestone, Ash!

Cheers ..... Charles


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## M.J (Nov 1, 2010)

What a fun idea!
I'll be giving it a go :thumbsup:


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## Jaximus (Jun 1, 2013)

That's crazy generous of you, man. Great idea for a competition, as well.


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## ash (Apr 23, 2013)

I've got another 50 or so forks in the gallery for the winner to choose from!

Some absolute beauties. I look forward to creating something nice for the 1000-footed one.


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## ash (Apr 23, 2013)

bigron said:


> great give away for those with video cameras


Or creative people who can document their efforts by way of radio or newspaper or other means, whether conventional or fantastical  Remember, the more entertaining the presentation, the less stringent the application of rules will be :lol:


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## Jaximus (Jun 1, 2013)

Sorry, guys. I actually made this shot a few years back. I had to dig up an old radio recording for evidence. I uploaded it to youtube. It's real.






That pretty much settles it.


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## ash (Apr 23, 2013)

LAWWLL! :rofl:

You're a contender, Jaximatic  No doobt aboot it.


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## Btoon84 (Nov 22, 2011)

Congrats on 1K dude. You've covered some ground in the time you've been here  glad to have ya! Thanks for the comp. hope to try


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## ash (Apr 23, 2013)

We're half-way through with only Jaximus in contention. Here's a little demonstration shoot I did this evening. 1000 feet, 22 feet at a time. three cans and 70 shots.






Beat it!


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## Jaximus (Jun 1, 2013)

Ash, I prefer to shoot flats in a TTF configuration. Also, I've got long but somewhat slender fingers. The rest of my SS, well that's up to you. I've seen what your imagination can come up with and I don't want to hold you back. Go wild, buddy.


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## ash (Apr 23, 2013)

Jaximus said:


> I've seen what your imagination can come up with and I don't want to hold you back. Go wild, buddy.


Hey, I thought we weren't going to talk about that in public!


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## Jaximus (Jun 1, 2013)

Our love is too beautiful to remain a secret, ash. The world must know...


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## Jaximus (Jun 1, 2013)

I decided to do this for real today. Had a really rough start, then kicked it into high gear and started nailing shot after shot. Ended up getting 31 hits at 33 feet in 66 shots. I go over to stop recording on my phone and see that at some point it decided to stop on it's own. It literally only recorded the worst part of my shooting. Pretty cheesed off. I feel pretty stupid because I almost stopped it a few times when I was changing cans or collecting ammo. I would have noticed it was off, but in my mind I was leaving it running for posterity. That really worked out. Anyway, here's the short and ugly version of what I did get:






I snagged some pics of my cans I ended up going through.

















One of those cans was my practice can, but I couldn't figure out which one. I was using 1/2" steel and for some reason it was ripping cans in-half like crazy. So, 31 hits at 33 feet is 1,023 feet. It'll work. For now...


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## ash (Apr 23, 2013)

Good work, Jaximatic!


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## Jaximus (Jun 1, 2013)

Thanks, ash. When you say this contest will conclude on the 14, are you saying that the 14th is the last day to submit an entry, or that at 0000 hours (12:00 AM) July 14th no more entries will be accepted? Also, is this local Auckland time, Zulu time, Mars time, peanut butter jelly time?


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## M.J (Nov 1, 2010)

Here you go, guys. I finally got out to do this one! :woot:

20 hits from 50'. Took me 29 shots and I did it in 2:18

This contest is awesome!

A side note... I was using looped tubes and managed to break three sets in the process of tying to get through this video. I was using old sets from my "box o' bands" and I guess they were all not long for this world :iono:


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## Jaximus (Jun 1, 2013)

Nice shooting, MJ. I hate you.


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## M.J (Nov 1, 2010)

Jaximus said:


> Nice shooting, MJ. I hate you.


We've still got a couple days, you can beat that :thumbsup:


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## Jaximus (Jun 1, 2013)

M.J said:


> Jaximus said:
> 
> 
> > Nice shooting, MJ. I hate you.
> ...


Man, last week, or early this week I could have. I was all bummed that the match heads I was consistently hitting weren't lighting. Then, on Tuesday, it all broke loose. No clue why, just all of a sudden I couldn't hit anything. Perhaps I became too obsessed with lighting a match, I don't know. Too hard on myself when I missed. Today I changed from holding the pouch thumb-up to holding it thumb-down (what I started with about a month ago) and made an immediate 70% improvement. I dunno, man.

MJ, you need to drive on over to my house. We'll have a picnic, then you can spend the rest of the afternoon giving me some hands-on instruction (if you know what I mean :naughty. We can easily shoot out to 100 meters on my property. We'll try to get to 1000 feet in 4 shots. I'll make a pie.


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## Beanflip (Sep 11, 2010)

Nothing wrong with a little" bro mance." Lol!


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## ash (Apr 23, 2013)

Jaximus said:


> Thanks, ash. When you say this contest will conclude on the 14, are you saying that the 14th is the last day to submit an entry, or that at 0000 hours (12:00 AM) July 14th no more entries will be accepted? Also, is this local Auckland time, Zulu time, Mars time, peanut butter jelly time?


The 14th is the last day and I'll wait until all timezones have cleared their Sunday out.

Also, I'll say that anyone who pledges an attempt by the end of Sunday can have a day or two to get their video (or whatever) posted up here.


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## ash (Apr 23, 2013)

Top effort, MJ! Now we're cooking.

Even if EWP's epic 168 yard, 2-shot entry doesn't come in, a state beginning with "I" is fixing to get a delivery from NZ.


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## Beanflip (Sep 11, 2010)

M.J said:


> Here you go, guys. I finally got out to do this one! :woot:
> 20 hits from 50'. Took me 29 shots and I did it in 2:18
> This contest is awesome!
> A side note... I was using looped tubes and managed to break three sets in the process of tying to get through this video. I was using old sets from my "box o' bands" and I guess they were all not long for this world :iono:


 I really enjoyed watching this video. You shot great and the view was cool. For many of the shots I could see the balls flight to the target. Bravo man! Excellent video. 
Fun stuff.


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## M.J (Nov 1, 2010)

Thanks, man!


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## M.J (Nov 1, 2010)

Jaximus said:


> M.J said:
> 
> 
> > Jaximus said:
> ...


It happens to all of us, buddy. Especially when we're pretty new to shooting.

I'm looking at having a slingshot get-together up here maybe in September or October and if the farmer has harvested the beans by then we'll have about a half-mile of shooting range. You can bring the pie :thumbsup:


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## Jaximus (Jun 1, 2013)

I've been taking a break from trying to get match lights in the Pocket Predator comp (for my sanity), but i've been keeping up with what's going on over in that thread and it's really got me thinking about exhibition shooting. Not trying to become a professionally sponsored exhibition shooter, just the history of that type of shooting. I keep coming back to Bob Munden. For one, I love revolvers in a very unnatural way, but it's also Bob's entire attitude. He seems like he would have fit in perfectly with the likes of Wild Bill and Annie Oakley. Anyway, this got me thinking about what's generally considered a pretty typical exhibition shot; aiming through a mirror.






For some reason I felt like this should go here. I'm pretty sure I should get some major bonus points. Seriously, though, has anyone seen anybody doing this with a slingshot? I've gotta say, it's a lot of fun.

That's not all, though. My winning entry will be revealed shortly.


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## Beanflip (Sep 11, 2010)

Pretty cool Jax! Love your theme music.


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## Jaximus (Jun 1, 2013)

Haha, thanks, Beanflip. My favorite thing in the world to do is fly rotary aircraft, so of course I'm a huge Airwolf fan.


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## Beanflip (Sep 11, 2010)

Jaximus said:


> Haha, thanks, Beanflip. My favorite thing in the world to do is fly rotary aircraft, so of course I'm a huge Airwolf fan.


I knew it sounded familiar but I didn't guess it right. Now it's time to name your slingshot Airwolf and light up a match bud!


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## M.J (Nov 1, 2010)

Jaximus said:


> That's not all, though. My winning entry will be revealed shortly.


So post it already, the suspense is killing me! anic:


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## Jaximus (Jun 1, 2013)

M.J said:


> Jaximus said:
> 
> 
> > That's not all, though. My winning entry will be revealed shortly.
> ...


You're just gonna have to sweat it out, buddy. The epicness... the dastardlyness... the pure insanity of it all is just too much to unleash on the world.


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## Btoon84 (Nov 22, 2011)

Sorry to Ash for the lack of participation here. The excuse for myself... eh, whatever, it doesn't matter. This was a cool idea, I wish I could have played along. I was with you guys in spirt. B)


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## Charles (Aug 26, 2010)

All right everyone! Here is my entry in the 1000 feet contest. Sorry to be so close to the wire, but government bureaucracy is a real pain. I just got permission from the Canadian Security Intelligence Service to release this previously Top Secret video. Hope you enjoy it.






Cheers ..... Charles


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## Jaximus (Jun 1, 2013)

Charles... Charles... that might be the funniest thing I have ever seen. I've got tears in my eyes and my side is killing me. Brilliant. Just... brilliant.


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## Beanflip (Sep 11, 2010)

Yes Charles, well done!


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## Charles (Aug 26, 2010)

Alas, because of advancing age, I can no longer shoot as well as I could when that video was made. So I cannot demonstrate the 1000 foot shot at a soda can today. But I hope the video establishes the fact that I used to be able to do it .... :wave:

Cheers ..... Charles


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## Charles (Aug 26, 2010)

M.J said:


> Here you go, guys. I finally got out to do this one! :woot:
> 
> 20 hits from 50'. Took me 29 shots and I did it in 2:18
> 
> ...


MJ, that was VERY impressive!!! You are an amazingly consistent shooter. Excellent job.

Cheers ..... Charles


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## M.J (Nov 1, 2010)

Thanks, Charles!
You wouldn't think so if you saw me shoot from 90'  I tried to do a video from that distance for this contest today and it took me something like 30 shots to get 12 hits :iono:


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## Jaximus (Jun 1, 2013)

Going about 1 for 2 at 90' still doesn't seem bad to me, MJ. Much better than I'm capable of.


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## Beanflip (Sep 11, 2010)

I'm with Jax. That's pretty good in my book.


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## Charles (Aug 26, 2010)

Heck, at 90 feet, I might just as well throw slingshot, ammo, and all down the range!!!! If I could hit 1 out of 30 at 90 feet I would be happy ... probably I would be happy just to see the can at 90 feet.

Cheers ..... Charles


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## Jaximus (Jun 1, 2013)

Well, here it is. The video you've all been waiting for. 3 shots, 1089ft. If you'd like you can just skip straight to the controversy at 1:35 in the video.






Work smarter, not harder, boys.

Now, is this fair? Probably not. Does it break the rules? Not necessarily.


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## Can-Opener (May 11, 2013)

That seems fair! LOL


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## ash (Apr 23, 2013)

OKAYYYYY!!!! The time limit has expired everywhere, all pledges are fulfilled and the contest has concluded. Alas, the loose rules and the loose morals of certain competitors have kept the result from being crystal clear and a judges decision is called for.

MJ has the best result by conventional means

Charles threw a possible knock-out punch with the aid of comedy

Jaximus has delivered on shooting, entertainment and treachery

The question of Ultimate Victor comes down to the legitimacy of Jaximus's unconventional ballistic performance...

It's not in the rules, but -










Congratulations, JAXIMUS UNDECIMUS MILLECIMUS!

Take a look through my fork gallery and let me know if any of them grab your gaze or if there are any particular colours, species or features you desire (TTF etc noted).

In honour of the supreme contributions of MJ and Charles I will extend the prize pool to both gentlemen by awarding them places in the Queue of Destiny. Holders of which, can expect to receive a second-born from one of my upcoming slingshot developments. Nice work, men! Thanks for joining in.

I'll post pictures of the Jaximus build here as I go. If anyone wants to continue the 1000ft quest, I'll offer another customised natural from my giant stash when I get to 2000 posts. This time I'll tighten up the rules a notch to encourage innovative shooting - One can hit per shot fired. Presentations must show all shots fired. Rube Goldberg technology allowed.


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## Jaximus (Jun 1, 2013)

Thank you, ash. I understand your ruling my be seen by some as controversial and that my level of despisement on this forum has risen by at least 300% (it was already pretty high), but I think we both did the right thing here. May this day serve as a warning to the rest of you; if you have loose rules in your competition, some jerk face will exploit them. Probably this jerk face.


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## Beanflip (Sep 11, 2010)

This was a great idea and great fun.
Congratulations Jerk face


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## Dr J (Apr 22, 2013)

Congratulations Ash on 1000 posts. Sorry I cannot enter contest, however, I wish the winner all the best. Dr. J


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## M.J (Nov 1, 2010)

Jaximus said:


> Thank you, ash. I understand your ruling my be seen by some as controversial and that my level of despisement on this forum has risen by at least 300% (it was already pretty high), but I think we both did the right thing here. May this day serve as a warning to the rest of you; if you have loose rules in your competition, some jerk face will exploit them. Probably this jerk face.


Congratz, bro.

I blame myself for not being more creative. I figured it would go down like this, that's why I didn't spend a lot of time trying to better my performance from before.

Hey Ash, if you have a modern-looking matchstick-style TTF shooter sitting around then that's what I need . Otherwise thanks for a fun contest :thumbsup:


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## Charles (Aug 26, 2010)

Congratulations to Jerkface ... just had to cheat, didn't you ... :neener:

At least SOME of us really can (or could when we were younger) hit a soda can at 1000 yards .... a memory I will always treasure ...

MJ, as I have said before, you are one heII of a shooter!

O.K. Ash ... this was fun, and good on ya for starting it! When the picking is my turn, just let me know ...

Cheers .... Charles


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## Jaximus (Jun 1, 2013)

I'm sorry, Charles. Not all of us can be recognized by The Fuhrer as the threat to the Reich.


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## Skillet (Apr 19, 2013)

Jaximus said:


> Sorry, guys. I actually made this shot a few years back. I had to dig up an old radio recording for evidence. I uploaded it to youtube. It's real.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


That was great. ROFLMAO!!!!


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## Jaximus (Jun 1, 2013)

Thanks, Skillet. I have a really odd sense of humor and I never really know if what I'm doing is actually funny, or just pure insanity. And it changes from day to day depending on how much the sleep deprivation is affecting me.

MJ, you really did a commendable job. Accurate, consistent, fast, but I expected all that stuff from you. You're just really good. However, the video Charles posted completely came out of left field and took me by surprise. I have no idea what film that was from, but the production values were excellent. The guy playing Hitler was scarily spot on. The graveness of the situation was apparent even to me (the only German words I know are the commands for my GSD). Then, on top of all that, you have these subtitles that on their own aren't especially funny, but when combined with Nazis create an unprecedented level of hilarity.

Touché, Charles... touché.


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## ash (Apr 23, 2013)

Thanks guys, you all did a fantastic job and really earned your rewards 

I have things in the Queue of Destiny that I think you guys will all dig, so stay tuned to this very same bat-channel for updates.


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## Charles (Aug 26, 2010)

Thanks for the kind words, Jax ... glad you enjoyed it.

Cheers .... Charles


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## Btoon84 (Nov 22, 2011)

Awesome of you Ash, I'm glad you selected Jaximus as the victor. His creativity really came out here and hit a home run. Not to sell Charles's wonderful Nazi video short. That was great too (awesome Charles) OR MJ's awesome shooting... But wow Jaximus, first the "interrupt program new broadcast" thing was great. But your final submission of you cheating your way to glory was great. Glad you're having fun and I appreciate your sense of humor. Congrats on your big WIN jerkface. A custom catapult from Ash.... ya, that's gonna be one bada$$ motherfu*%ing fork you can be sure of that!!!! :bowdown:


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## Dayhiker (Mar 13, 2010)

I wasn't following this thread cuz I can't shoot for sh*t. But I never laughed out loud so many times in any thread. Charles and Jaximus take a hundred bows apiece!!! That's entertainment.


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## Jaximus (Jun 1, 2013)

Thank you Btoon and Dayhiker. My aim is to entertain. I just showed the videos to my wife and she gave me this look like, "I can't believe I married this guy."

So, when I get kicked out, who's couch am I sleeping on? Anybody?


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## Charles (Aug 26, 2010)

Jaximus said:


> Thank you Btoon and Dayhiker. My aim is to entertain. I just showed the videos to my wife and she gave me this look like, "I can't believe I married this guy."
> 
> So, when I get kicked out, who's couch am I sleeping on? Anybody?


Hmmm ... I think I am glad I live so far away ....

Cheers .... Charles


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## Charles (Aug 26, 2010)

Btoon84 said:


> Awesome of you Ash, I'm glad you selected Jaximus as the victor. His creativity really came out here and hit a home run. Not to sell Charles's wonderful Nazi video short. That was great too (awesome Charles) OR MJ's awesome shooting... But wow Jaximus, first the "interrupt program new broadcast" thing was great. But your final submission of you cheating your way to glory was great. Glad you're having fun and I appreciate your sense of humor. Congrats on your big WIN jerkface. A custom catapult from Ash.... ya, that's gonna be one bada$$ motherfu*%ing fork you can be sure of that!!!! :bowdown:





Dayhiker said:


> I wasn't following this thread cuz I can't shoot for sh*t. But I never laughed out loud so many times in any thread. Charles and Jaximus take a hundred bows apiece!!! That's entertainment.


Thanks for the kind words, guys. It was a lot of fun ... even if I did not beat old Jax ... :neener:

Cheers ...... Charles


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## Jaximus (Jun 1, 2013)

Btoon84 said:


> wonderful Nazi video


I just wanted to point out that this happened. Nice one, Brandon. :angrymod:

I keep checking my mail and there's no slingshot in there. I guess I just need to check it harder.


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## ash (Apr 23, 2013)

I have pictures of it to post... BRB.


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## Jaximus (Jun 1, 2013)

I was on my way to bed when my phone told me I had an email. For some reason I checked it. How am I supposed to go to sleep now? anic: anic:


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## ash (Apr 23, 2013)

Forks - Birch and Pohutukawa









Birch - pruned from the middle tree by arborists. In fact I think it's the same fork sticking out towards the park bench: http://goo.gl/maps/QiShL

Pohutukawa - A storm dropped branch off this tree: http://goo.gl/maps/HOQ7S

The birch one is yet to get its name. The pohutukawa one will be "Scarlett", much like the flowers that bloom on the tree each Summer.


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## ash (Apr 23, 2013)

Under that bark - alabaster skin and pink on the inside:









TTF as requested:









Carved with the new knife:









Something worth getting your mitts on:









And Scarlett's elder sister, Janet (Willow posing as Oak) is a little further advanced:


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## ash (Apr 23, 2013)

PS - More to come. This is only half way through the process.


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## Jaximus (Jun 1, 2013)

Oh, man. I love where this is going. Gonna be a bada$$ slingshot for sure.


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## Dayhiker (Mar 13, 2010)

Couple of nice forks right there!


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## M.J (Nov 1, 2010)

Looking good!


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## Tube_Shooter (Dec 8, 2012)

Charles said:


> All right everyone! Here is my entry in the 1000 feet contest. Sorry to be so close to the wire, but government bureaucracy is a real pain. I just got permission from the Canadian Security Intelligence Service to release this previously Top Secret video. Hope you enjoy it.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


I have seen this footage years ago but it was not translated,thank you Charles for the translation it now makes perfect sense :rofl:


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## ash (Apr 23, 2013)

Update on Scarlett - she's slicker than a baby's hind end.

The transition between knife carved and ready for finish was a challenge. This wood is like stone to sand!

Now she needs to dress up for the prom - more to come...


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## Charles (Aug 26, 2010)

Lookin' reeaal good!

Cheers ...... Charles


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## M.J (Nov 1, 2010)

That's going to make a great prize for sure!


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## Jaximus (Jun 1, 2013)

Oh, my. Those are some clean looking lines, ash. I love a woman with some curves.


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## ash (Apr 23, 2013)

Another dirty, teasy update. Orgy - it's only natural.









Natural #1 is ready to test shoot... that means #2 must be soon


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## Jaximus (Jun 1, 2013)

Ash, you filthy tease!


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## M.J (Nov 1, 2010)

Slingshot fourgy!


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## All Buns Glazing (Apr 22, 2012)

Charles said:


> All right everyone! Here is my entry in the 1000 feet contest. Sorry to be so close to the wire, but government bureaucracy is a real pain. I just got permission from the Canadian Security Intelligence Service to release this previously Top Secret video. Hope you enjoy it.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


HOW DID I MISS THAT VIDEO? THAT'S GOLD! SOLID GOLD. NAY! PLATINUM! NAY! PLATINUM PLATED PLATINUM!


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## ash (Apr 23, 2013)

Scarlett is now complete and dressed up for the prom. I'll post pics when she has arrived safely in Illinois.


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## ash (Apr 23, 2013)

Scarlett von Jaximus is in her new home: http://slingshotforum.com/topic/26128-scarlett-has-landed/

Next is MJ's modern matchstick TTF machine.


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## M.J (Nov 1, 2010)

:woot:


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